Pre-fight rambling:
Going to meed to make this quick again this week. I'm continually amazed at what
we're not seeing televised this year. In order to face Dr. Inferno Jr., Tentomushi 8.0 had to beat
Ultra-Mega-Super Mecha Catbot (or whatever the name is this year). It's not that I
feel particularly deprived by not seeing this robot, but I always thought that Fon
was a somewhat of a Battlebots media darling. I'm surprised they skipped that fight,
especially considering the non-stop action we were presented with this week.
Tentomushi 8.0 vs Dr. Inferno Jr.
Hey, Lightweights! Wow. We've got Tentomushi 8.0 on one side. As I remember I
thought Tentomushi 7.0 was supposed to be the last one, retired after one too many
drubbings by Wedge of Doom, but I guess it was just too hard to give it up. Tentomushi 8.0
is a smotherbot, with a couple wheels and I think a mini saw as the guts of the bot,
and then a large ladybug sandbox to use as the smother weapon. Tentomushi, any
version, is not one of my favorite bots, although I am definitely into the idea
of a smotherbot. One of my robot ideas I might have pursued had I even a wisp of
mechanical talent was the Iron Maiden bot. Like Tentomushi except with a
lot more spikes. Smack that clamshell down on your opponent and you're bound to hit
something important. (My other idea is the Neutron Star bot, where I'd get a super fast
motor and some wheels, and a large, vaguely torpedo-shaped blob of some super dense
material like tungsten carbide. Somehow, the torpedo blob would be attached to the
motor and wheels. The result would be a small, kind of pointy robot for whatever weight
division. This bot would have two speeds, stop and screaming. I'd find the best
driver ever and have them drive around the box really fast and ram into the opponent
at high rates of speed. All that mass in a small package, travelling at maximum
velocity.....but I'm completely digressing.....) Anyway, back at the fight we have Dr. Inferno Jr. who is a multi-purpose
bot that looks like some sort of humanoid electronic learning toy from the late 1970's.
Dr. Inferno has a saw arm, and some other weapon on the other arm, but that other
arm appears to have been removed in a previous fight. This is a really crappy description
but if I went into anymore detail we might never actually make it to the hot bot action.
OK RFT. Finally. Bots motor a bit an then Dr. Inferno Jr. gets under the side of Tentomushi 8.0 and
smushes her into the spikes. Oof. Tentomushi 8.0 gets away and drives somewhere while Dr. Inferno Jr. manages
to somehow get hung up on the opening for the ramrods. Dr. Inferno Jr. drives towards Tentomushi 8.0 again,
trying to get in another hit on the side of the wheel, but the aim is off, and Dr. Inferno Jr.
ends up smothered under the sandbox. Yeah, fine, but it looks like Tentomushi 8.0 can't
capitalize on this as the smothered Dr. Inferno Jr. still manages to drive Tentomushi 8.0 into the side
of the screw casing. Oof. Dr. Inferno Jr. gets out and motors a bit while Bil tells us that
Tentomushi 8.0 is pure smother this year, and the little internal saw has been removed. Huh.
I didn't know that. I guess I learned something. OK, Dr. Inferno Jr. is back smothered again,
but still manages to push Tentomushi 8.0 to the saws. Zzzz. Oooh. Look at this! As Tentomushi 8.0 moves
away, still with the sandbox in the smother position, Dr. Inferno Jr. starts to tip over, and tip,
and tip.....but Tentomushi 8.0 just can't seem to finish it off and Dr. Inferno Jr. extricates himself before
he falls over. Now Dr. Inferno Jr. manages to push Tentomushi 8.0 to the saws and we've got some saw on sandbox
action. Now we've got this camera shot that includes Lisa driving her bot and her
controller looks to be about the size of Alaska. We now experience Dr. Inferno Jr.
continually smushing Tentomushi 8.0 into the spike strip about 6 times. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof.
Oof. Oof. Now we've got Dr. Inferno Jr. trying to get away from the sandbox and kind of dragging
Tentomushi 8.0 all over the place, and almost under the hammer, and then Dr. Inferno Jr. almost tips again
as he finally escapes the stranglehold of the ladybug. Now we've got some driving around
during which time Tentomushi 8.0 manages to take a hammer hit. Pow. Now Dr. Inferno Jr. is all pushy again,
and now he's all smothered again, although that ladybug is really starting to look sad.
Dr. Inferno Jr. pushes Tentomushi 8.0 to the spike strip and then rams Tentomushi 8.0 into the spikes several times.
I don't think Dr. Inferno Jr. realized this, but after the 4th ram, Tentomushi 8.0 was actually hung up on the
spikes, and if he had just stopped at that point the fight would have been over.
But no, Dr. Inferno Jr. slams Tentomushi 8.0 a 5th time, and removes her from the spikes. Now we get an
extended shot of Lisa and her controller, which is actually about the size of South
America, and her kind of bluish color hair (I've seen bluer). Back at the
fight, Tentomushi 8.0 is being smushed into the spikes again. Now we've got Tentomushi 8.0 being pushed to
the saws again and major extended saw hit. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Tentomushi 8.0 drops the
sandbox as she backs off, and almost, almost, tips Dr. Inferno Jr. again. We get a brief shot of
Inferno Labs personnel, and I want one of those flame shirts. It would match my flame
shoes. Now we've got the 20 second countdown as Dr. Inferno Jr. smashes into the front of Tentomushi 8.0.
Both bots tip backwards, leading to a stalemate where neither bot has any wheels on the
ground to get them out of the situation. Saws pop, but don't do anything to
alter the situation. Time runs out as the stalemate continues on. I personally
think that Dr. Inferno Jr. won, and the judges agree, 26-19 decision for Dr. Inferno Jr.. Guess we're not
going to get to see that Tentomushi 8.0/Wedge of Doom re-re-re-re-re-rematch this year.
Son of Whyachi vs. No Apologies
We've seen both these bots before. Normally I'd have links to their other fights,
but I'm feeling suddenly lazy. No Apologies has sprouted this really long, weblike, flimsy-looking
lifter attachment to get under Son of Whyachi while staying out of range of the "meat tenderizers".
(In a previous episode, Carmen alterted us to the possibility that this strategy may
be used, successfully, on another famous non-invertible robot with spinning weapon).
OK RFT. Son of Whyachi spins kind of to speed while No Apologies drives over to poke at him with
the flimsy "Whyachi Tool" attachment or whatever they're calling it. Son of Whyachi ends up smushed into the spikes
while No Apologies pokes with the flimsy attachment to try to get it under Son of Whyachi. Now we've got the
bots in open space with Son of Whyachi spinning and No Apologies poking with the flimsy attachment. You know,
it really looks to me like Son of Whyachi has had an unfortunate encounter with a large
amount of barbituates. Those spinning hammers are definitely missing some of their
oomph. So now we have Whyachi-On-Ludes clanging things with the hammers without really hurting
anything, and No Apologies poking with the flimsy attachment without really hurting anything. Now
we've got Whyachi-On-Ludes clanging the back of No Apologies and then somewhat damaging the flimsy attachment,
and then No Apologies kind of driving somewhere and activating the hammer into the floor.
Whyachi-On-Ludes abuses the flimsy attachment again while No Apologies reflexively pounds the floor. Whyachi-On-Ludes
goes over and wrestles with the ramrods a bit. Now No Apologies drives over, maybe looking for
action, while Whyachi-On-Ludes slowly spins the hammers so that they become caught up in the now
very beat looking flimsy attachment. Whyachi-On-Ludes starts dragging No Apologies somewhere, and No Apologies
obediently tags along with the hammer in the upright position, and I wonder whether
any damage could be inflicted if No Apologies was to say, drop the hammer. No Apologies drops the hammer.
It hits the floor. I guess not. Whyachi-On-Ludes now drags No Apologies past a random piece of metal
that at one time was part of the flimsy attachment and then for some reason, drives
himself right into the spikes at about 0.25 mph, releasing No Apologies. Whyachi-On-Ludes then makes a lousy
attempt at spinning the hammers to something like part speed while No Apologies collects him
and starts to push him towards a hazard. Whyachi-On-Ludes makes a feeble complaint by sending a
former piece of the flimsy attachment flying before No Apologies presses him into the screw
casing. We hear a loud "clink" on the soundtrack that must have slipped in from Full
Metal Challenge or something because it certainly didn't come from Whyachi-On-Ludes hitting that
screw. Now we have extended screw surfing from Whyachi-On-Ludes while No Apologies displays the now completely
creamed flimsy attachment and then eventually taps Whyachi-On-Ludes with the hammer. This fight
is making me long for the non-stop action of the Mechavore/Mauler pushing match.
Now we have No Apologies slowly pushing Whyachi-On-Ludes and then Whyachi-On-Ludes slowly spinning the hammers, and
then No Apologies quickly attacking with the hammer and then exhibiting the now completely
destroyed hammer to the audience. Then we have Whyachi-On-Ludes making a really lame attempt to
spin the hammers, and then we have an equally lame attempt by No Apologies to attack with
his own hosed hammer, and then we have No Apologies lamely pushing Whyachi-On-Ludes to the spikes and as
Whyachi-On-Ludes lamely taps the spikes we get that lame "clink" that slipped in from the
"Controlled Destruction of Old Hotels" special on the Discovery Channel and then
time runs out before something else lame can happen. Yes it is too close to call,
because we have three minutes of two bots basically doing nothing. Do we have to
award points? I guess so. 24-21 decision for No Apologies. Too bad, because I liked the Team Whyachi
pit crew shirts. Good, because the removal of Son of Whyachi removes a big obstacle between
my beloved Diesector and that coveted Giant Nut. In fact, with Toro and Son of Whyachi gone
Diesector's looking real good.
Huggy Bear vs. Bad Attitude
Huggy Bear is a very low H-shaped bot with an enormous footprint. The idea is that the opponent
drives into the "H" and then a bar comes across to "hug" and trap the opponent so that Huggy Bear
can deliver it to a hazard. Bad Attitude is an invertible double wedge that drives real fast.
OK RFT. Bad Attitude starts driving in large loops around Huggy Bear to try and hit him on the
side, but Huggy Bear does a really good job of keeping the open part of the "H" facing towards Bad Attitude.
Bad Attitude finally gets in a glancing blow on the arm of the "H" (or the "hug zone" as I guess they
call it). Now we've got another round of positioning (which I find enjoyable if for no other
reason than to watch how fast Bad Attitude can motor around the box.) and then finally Bad Attitude gets a square
hit on the side of Huggy Bear. Bad Attitude drives right under Huggy Bear with the wedge and then both bots continue
on as if nothing had happened. Now we've got another extended period of positioning as Huggy Bear
basically spins in place, keeping the "hug zone" always facing Bad Attitude. Now Bad Attitude is tapping the
side of Huggy Bear and somehow manages to get caught in the hug zone. Huggy Bear takes a saw hit before the
full hug can be applied. That tends to happen when Huggy Bear moves forward, I mean, if you're that
wide it's going to be pretty inevitable that you collect a couple hazards anywhere that you move.
Now we've got a shot of the Huggy Bear folks with their controller that makes the antenna look humongous
and what is it with the controller envy all of a sudden? Bad Attitude gets under the side of Huggy Bear and pushes
him again, and then flirts with the hug zone before finally taking a saw hit. Bad Attitude zooms backwards
right over Huggy Bear's crossbar and then onto a different set of saws. Zzzzzzzz. Bad Attitude hits the side of
Huggy Bear again then backs over the saws again. Zzzzzz again. Bad Attitude throws it back into drive and motors
directly into the waiting hug zone. Clamp. Huggy Bear pushes Bad Attitude to the saws and waits there for a few
seconds but Pete just won't cooperate (which is probably best for Huggy Bear because the way he's positioned,
he's going to take equally as bad of a saw hit as Bad Attitude if the saws pop). Huggy Bear decides
to take Bad Attitude to the hammer instead and this time Pete goes along with the plan. Pow x4!
Now Huggy Bear brings Bad Attitude to the screw, and Bad Attitude surfs the screw, which frees him from Huggy Bear's grip. Bad Attitude
backs under the hammer, and then drives into the screw. Pow. Oof. Bad Attitude drives over the crossbar of
Huggy Bear and then directly under the hammer, and then into the screw casing. Man, Bad Attitude is taking
a beating. Now we have a very long period of Bad Attitude driving in large circles around Huggy Bear, and Huggy Bear
spinning in place, successfully keeping the hug zone facing Bad Attitude. Bad Attitude eventually drives over
the saws, which toss him onto the top of Huggy Bear. Huggy Bear starts to move off towards a hazard, but Bad Attitude
extricates himself from the situation and then drives directly into the spike strip by the hammer.
Now we have Bad Attitude driving on top of Huggy Bear a couple times, and not much else happening before time
runs out. 30-15 Huggy Bear wins.
